The following question was asked by the author of the blog Christian Wife. She has a very good blog that I read often. It has taken me about a week to answer her question simply because I don’t look at myself as an authority on homemaking. I take no credit for any of the things that I share on this blog as knowledge that I have obtained on my own. Everything that I know regarding being a wife is by the grace and mercy of God. He has blessed me in order that I bring glory to Him and not to myself.
Christian Wife‘s Questions:
I have a question for you. You seem to be such a great home maker. Were you always like that? When you were younger did you think that is how you’d be when you were older?
The reason I am asking is because I don’t like house work, I hate gardening, and I try to get out of cooking as often as I can. But I feel guilty about that. I try to keep things as nice as I can, but things like that don’t interest me, they never have.
I know that everyone was made differently and one persons path does not dictate every one’s path. But I wonder if it’s something I will grow into, or if I just don’t have an interest in it and that’s that.
To answer plainly your first two questions…No and No.
If you would have known me five years ago I wouldn’t have been able to tell you with any amount of wisdom, the first thing about being a homemaker.
At that time in my life I was just a stay at home mom pregnant with my fourth child. Everything was being held together with krazyglue even the last shreds of my sanity and marriage.
I always dreamed of being a wife and mother, but it was the kind that you find on t.v. The type with the perfect career and also cool with her children’s friends. I never imagined myself as a woman who would ever find joy in planning, cleaning or organizing a home. Or even being at home full-time for that matter. I thought all of that was for weak women with no goals in life.
After being saved for three years is when I began to pray for God to give me the desire to be a “keeper at home”. This is when His will became my will. He changed my way of thinking. He challenged me to find joy in the things that He had chosen for me. But it all began with me asking Him what was His will for my life.
I later reserved myself to the fact that He wanted me to be at home. He showed me, through His word how important my role was in helping my husband work towards the vision that he had for our family.
The biggest hurdle that I had overcome was understanding how important my role as keeper of the home was. I began by reading the Bible to see what Gods word said regarding the role of the wife. In Proverbs 31:13 it says that a wife whose worth is far above rubies “works willingly with her hands.” So I prayed for God to give me the
desire to work willingly with my hands.
Proverbs 31:27 is another a great example of the outlook that I desired to exemplify. “She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.” Asking God to set my focus on this principle changed my outlook as well. When I began to find joy in caring for my home it benefited my entire family. My family became more joyful and optimistic. Verse says “Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.” The tone of my home changed as a result of the principle in Proverbs 31:27 and the promise in verse 28.
I find joy in creating a place where we can relax and feel safe. The joy that I find in keeping my home is the result of knowing that what I am doing brings God glory, makes my husband proud and sets a good example for my children.
The joy that I have is not in the act of gardening or the sweeping, it is in the knowing that my husband can work less and be home more because I save us money by gardening.
It comes from knowing that I am focused on pleasing God by serving my family in any way that I am able. It comes from knowing that I look for ways to be a help to my family by making our home a peaceful and organized place for us to live.
Pray that God will give you the desires of His heart. In order for us to change we must first change our way of thinking.
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
My home has become a more peaceful place for us since my outlook regarding homemaking has changed. I have proved to myself that following the example of Proverbs 31 was the “good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God” for me and my family.