Originally Posted April 2008 I never imagined how challenging it would be to parent. While my oldest child was young I never thought that we would get to a point where she would begin to pull away. I assumed that some teens did that because they had bad parents, but so much has been revealed to me.
What do I do with a child that seems to despise every word that comes out of my mouth? How do I encourage a child that seems so discouraged? Well that is what I want to discuss today. I want to encourage anyone who is struggling to win back the hearts of thier children.
I sometimes feel as though my efforts are in vain, but this morning I asked myself the same question that the Apostle Paul asked concerning his responsibility to his followers. “Are not ye my work in the Lord?”
Loving my children is one of my primary jobs as their parent. Helping them to overcome challenges is my duty. In the book of Genesis 3:15, God told Eve that there would be enmity between Satan’s offspring and the offspring of the Women. No wonder my children struggle emotionally and spiritually. They are under serious attack.
I have been called to be a shepherd and leader for my children. It is great that I serve in other capacities to help bring others to Christ, but I cannot lose focus on my primary role. My primary responsibility is to first Shepherd my own sheep into His Kingdom. “If I be not an apostle unto others, yet doubtless I am unto you: for the seal of my apostleship are ye in the ye in the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 9:2
So how then do I deal with my children when they struggle with their faith? How do I assure them that they are loved when they don’t feel loved? Paul assures me that I have been given the power to love my children through their struggles and the power to handle the work that it entails 1 Corinthians 9:3-6
In order to have the rainbow I must accept rain and in order for me to have grown crops I must have first plowed the field. I must daily transform my mind. I must remind myself of the hope that is at the end of all of my efforts. I must plow their hearts even when my back is aching and the ground of their hearts have become hardened.
So what do I do to help my children if they are struggling?
- I love them more.
- I touch them more.
- I spend more time with them.
- I pray with them and for them even more.
- I fight against the feeling of frustration and defeat.
- I ask God to give me the patience to meet my child’s needs.
- I encourage and genuinely praise them even more.
- I look for the positive in them rather than the negative.
- I overlook some of their faults during this time in order to show them the grace of God.
- I ask God to help me to remember that they are not my enemy.
- I give them as much of my undivided attention as possible.
- I show them that through my actions that it is my pleasure to be around them.
- But above all I love on them more and more.
1 Peter 4:8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.
What are you doing to keep or recapture the heart of your child?