How do I become a wife who is able to submit to my husband?
A woman who chooses a lifestyle of continued reverence and submission towards her husband, is a women who understands the powerful impact of her role in the family. Whenever I see a wife who shows contempt or disrespect for her husband, what I really see is a woman who believes that she is powerless.
Do you try to change your husband with arguing and rebellion? A women who wants to change her husband will first change herself. Below I have listed four key challenges for you. If followed they will move you closer to becoming a wife that reveres her husband.
1. Pray daily that you would speak and think positively about his character and behavior.
In order to treat your spouse differently, you will have to think differently about him. Your husband will know your thoughts toward him whether you verbally express them or not.
Proverbs 23:6-8Eat thou not the bread of him that hath an evil eye, neither desire thou his dainty meats: For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.The morsel which thou hast eaten shalt thou vomit up, and lose thy sweet words.
2. Overlook his faults.
This does not pertain to sin. Overlook the fact that he leaves his work clothes on the floor or that he does not replace the toilet paper when he uses the last of the roll. Don’t let the small things irritate you. Satan knows what bothers you and he will use anyone (especially those closest to you) to separate you from the peace of God. You’ll find some further reading in the scripture reference below.
3. Take on a child-like mentality.
What worked for me in teaching myself to speak respectfully to my husband was thinking of him as my father. Whenever I would prepare to speak to my husband I would ask myself the question,”Would I speak to my father this way?” The question can be replaced with anyone whom you respect. We should not speak to anyone better than the way in which we speak to our own spouse.
Colossians 4:5 Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.
4. Learn patience and self control.
This was and is one of the hardest Fruit of the Spirit for me to maintain. I must pray daily for the ability to be patient and temperate. I can see my self become easily agitated and hostile on the days that I don’t pray the will of God over my flesh. Another word for patience is long-suffering. This area is where I’ve grown ever more closer to God. I can see His power working in me to be a patient and temperate wife in my interactions with my husband.
Ecclesiastes 7:7-9 Surely oppression maketh a wise man mad; and a gift destroyeth the heart. Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit. Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.
1 Thessalonians 5:13-15…Be at peace among yourselves. Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all men. See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men.
You are not alone in your desire to honor God and your husband. When we follow Gods perfect plan for our marriages we are opening the door for a home and lives to be filled with peace and respect.