When I first gave my life to Christ, I had a pastor who would preach often regarding satan’s attitude towards the family. My former pastor showed me through the use of scripture how much satan hates the family structure and all that it represents.
With that being said, I have used this very same knowledge to aid me in the process of keeping my family together during trying times.
Many of us have or will experience rough spots in our marriage and parenting relationships. What I would like to focus in on is, how do we respond in these times of trouble?
The trouble that am specifically referring to is financial trouble. These are the troubles that most often lead to divorce. My husband and I have had our share of financial challenges throughout our marriage, some of which have led to discussions of divorce.
But what is it that has kept our marriage together during the financial strain?
1. I didn’t blame my husband for our financial troubles.
Instead of blaming him I conditioned myself to encourage him. I’d tell him that we will make it through this. I reminded him that we’ve been here before and God has provided then and He will provide now.
This strengthened his faith in God and his love for me. We helped each other believe through tough times, which avoided divorce and helped us to live in peace.
1 Corinthians 7:13-15
And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
2. I prayed for a surrendered mind.
Instead of worrying about how we were going to meet each financial need, I would remind myself of Gods’ promises.
These are just a few of the promises that I use to remind myself that God is in control.
Deuteronomy 4:31 For the LORD thy God is a merciful God;) he will not forsake thee, neither destroy thee, nor forget the covenant of thy fathers which he sware unto them.
Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.
Joshua 1:5 As I was with Moses, so I will be with thee: I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.
Matthew 6:27-29 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; 29 and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
3. Finally I prayed for Gods wisdom.
I did that so that I didn’t make hasty and foolish decisions. I also prayed for a surrendered heart so that pride didn’t creep in, causing me not to submit to my husbands leadership of our family.
I don’t know about you but I have certainly struggled with wanting to take control of the family. Especially when I believe that my husband has made what I deem to be an unwise decision.
Reacting in such a manner is in complete opposition to Gods word.
No marriage comes without it’s share of challenges. In Queen Elizabeth’s speech she said, “Grief is the price that we pay for love” and if that is so, each of must accept the grievous times as a natural occurrence and depend on God to help us through it.
Financial management can often be a topic for heated discussion in marriage, but God does not desire that to be the case.
What’s the hardest part about discussing or managing your finances?
Thank you for posting about this subject. I’ve been married 4 years now and have pretty much been the sole provider for our home. It’s something that I didn’t completely agree to in the beginning and we are in the same position as when we started. I’ve made the mistake of pushing too hard towards him working and trying to control the decisions being made for us, but the more I seek God on this, the more conviction I’ve had of my previous actions. Yet it’s not right, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to about it.
I would really love some counsel. I’ve reached out to female leadership at my church but it’s felt more so like they are not leading me biblically and I just feel ashamed afterwards. What would you suggest? It’s caused a lot of bitterness and I’m at the end of my rope.
I am right there with you! My husband and I have gone through many similar seasons to yours. I know what a difficult time it can be, and how difficult submission can seem at those times. Keep up the fight though. You sound like you are headed on a path toward victory. Lean on the Lord. That always helps me. I pray you are granted peace in your soul, and in your marriage.
Hi @Melissa, Let’s talk through this privately. Tap the link to book a session. http://k3e.618.mywebsitetransfer.com/downloads/1-hour-virtual-coaching-session
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Hi there,
Thank you for posting about this subject. I’ve been married 4 years now and have pretty much been the sole provider for our home. It’s something that I didn’t completely agree to in the beginning and we are in the same position as when we started. I’ve made the mistake of pushing too hard towards him working and trying to control the decisions being made for us, but the more I seek God on this, the more conviction I’ve had of my previous actions. Yet it’s not right, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to about it.
I would really love some counsel. I’ve reached out to female leadership at my church but it’s felt more so like they are not leading me biblically and I just feel ashamed afterwards. What would you suggest? It’s caused a lot of bitterness and I’m at the end of my rope.
Thank you for reading!
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I am right there with you! My husband and I have gone through many similar seasons to yours. I know what a difficult time it can be, and how difficult submission can seem at those times. Keep up the fight though. You sound like you are headed on a path toward victory. Lean on the Lord. That always helps me. I pray you are granted peace in your soul, and in your marriage.
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