A Proverbs Wife

Praying For God To Change Your Spouse Does Not Work

We can all be stubborn at times and I can say that I’ve had my fair share of stiffnecked behavior both inside of and outside of my marriage.

My stubbornness has helped me at times when I really needed to stand my ground but it has also hurt me when the cost of what I would loose outweighed the value of what I refused to give up.

All of my experience has taught me that in order for wives to fight and win the battles that matter the most, we must always count up the cost.

Let me say that again…WE MUST ALWAYS COUNT UP THE COST!!

When we argue with our husbands or refuse to support them on an issue we must know what it will cost us. Husbands more than anything want to be respected. Respect is how they receive love as I shared in an article titled  Loving Your Husband From His Perspective and Bring Out the Best In Your Husband.

Christian husbands desire to be talked to like they are somebody important to their wives. Most are not sexist dictators that refuse to allow their wives to have a fair say in things. In fact true Christian husband desire and value their wives thoughts however, they want to respected as I shared here in How Should a Wife Respectfully Disagree With Your Husband?

There are several reasons why a wife would refuse to give her husband full reign in the family, many which have to do with trust. For that reason I’ll focus on the trust issue and what you can do to help assuage your fears about trusting the family to your husband. You can also read further on my thoughts on true submission in my article Becoming a Wife That Submits to Your Husband. In the article I talk about what true submission is, the benefits and how you can accomplish it.

So let’s talk about the remedies to combat any fears we may have about our husbands leading the family. Here’s are 5 key points to remember about our husbands but more so about God.

#1- If a husband has given His life to the Lord, he is capable of leading our family in every aspect.

#2- God already has a back up plan for our husbands mistakes.

#3- When wives hold on to their perceived control over the headship of the family, it is an outward expression of  fear of their husbands failure.

#4- A wife’s refusal to submit control can keep her husband from becoming the man and husband God desired him to be.

#5- A Godly husband will value and desire his wife’s opinion. He will desire it even more when it’s not forced upon him.


Father, I ask that you’d give each of the women reading this today the faith to trust what your word says about supporting their husbands. Help them to remember that you are for them and not against them. Help them know that you are the remedy for their husbands failures and that regardless of what he may do, that you will reward them for their obedience and willingness to yield to Your will. Bless each women with an abundance of your faith that they may be able to make the needed changes to become the women that you have called them to be.


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3 thoughts on “Praying For God To Change Your Spouse Does Not Work

  1. I think that it is Biblical to pray for both yourself, and your Husband ,that God will change you both in accordance with His will. I know it can work – i have seen it in my own Marriage. Gradually , God is changing us both , for His glory. Change takes time , often. It is not easy, but with God’s help, we can do it , and become more like our Saviour, The Lord Jesus. We should not limit God, and we ought to pray in line with His will for our lives .


  2. I like the first point but for the many wives whose husbands are not saved it could create some confusion. Christian or not, he is head of the home. If he is not saved then he would simply not be a spiritual leader.


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