I shared the news on my Facebook page about being asked to be on the show “Wife Swap”. When I got the email I thought it was a mass email sent out to several people by ABC’s casting team. Public Relations and casting people often send out mass emails all the time fishing for opportunities to get the word out about their client or brand.
However, this was different. It was sent directly to me, from the producers using my site contact form. The sender had actually taken the time to visit my page.
To say that I wasn’t feeling kinda special would be a lie. Deep down or maybe not so deep, we all desire to be recognized. So to be contacted out of the blue by a major network show is mind boggling. I’m still wondering what occurred to lead producers to learn about my site.
After reading the email I sent it to my husband who was still asleep at the time. When he got up to cut grass we had a 20 minute conversation about the opportunity.
When Wife Swap aired back in the day, I was excited about the how the show could teach husbands and wives to cherish each other more. I figured a week away from your spouse would either be a blessing or the longest two weeks of your life.
I believed the show could be a great facilitator in giving people a real world view of how Christians live behind closed doors.
However, after watching several episodes and seeing how crazy the editing made people look especially Christians. At that point we decided “Wife Swap” was not the best avenue for Christians to tell others about Jesus.
Although my husband and I had made our decision about the show early on, we still took a few minutes to revisit our initial decision…
because the chance to make $10,000 for two weeks worth of work doesn’t come along everyday.
After talking it over here are some of the things we came up with.
Money is not everything. The money wasn’t a big motivating factor for us. We are confident that if God wanted us to have $10,000 He wouldn’t provide it in away that could possibly damage our witness of faith and hurt those who look to us as mentors.
We sleep together. My husband and I have never slept apart for more than a day or two since we married almost 13 years ago. Two weeks would be hard on both of us. Also, many who commented on my Facebook page mentioned how inappropriate it would be under normal circumstances for a married woman to sleep in the home of another married man. I agree with my readers who pointed this out which is another reason why I decided it was not in my best interest to be on the show.
Protecting my children. Wife Swap is known for swapping wives with ones that have a total opposite belief system than theirs. While I have no fear of Satan, I’d rather not expose my children to Satanic influences. They are still growing in their faith so putting them in a situation where they’d have to defend what they believe against a seasoned Satanic worshiper would not be wise on my part as a parent.
Major Lifestyle Differences. I love my husband and there’s nothing I’d change about our roles as husband and wife but I know non Christians will agree with the Biblical roles we follow. I wouldn’t want another women putting my husband down because she disagrees with our lifestyle. I’m not a perfect and any women disrespecting my husband would make me lose my character. (I know my limitations)
Mocking the Gospel. Many of you mentioned this could be an opportunity to spread the gospel to a family and many families nationwide who do not know the true love of Christ. However, knowing that that is not the mission of the show’s producers I don’t think that being on the show would be the best use of my time and also my ministry. I am so glad that God has already blessed me with a place where I can share my family and share how we live on a day-to-day basis. I thank God that he has allowed me to share encouragement and inspirational stories about how I live as a Christian right here on aproverbswife.com. While I appreciate the opportunity to be on the show I do not believe that it is the platform in which God wants to use me to spread His gospel. He has already provided me with a platform to encourage wives and husbands toward living God focus marriages. I pray that one day I can reach a larger audience but for now I am more than blessed to be able to minister right where I am and to who God has sent to this blog. I thought about how many people would begin watching the show again or as a result of me being on it and that didn’t sit well with me. The show does not glorify Godly principles which we can tell just by the name. God is not interested in us swapping wives and at the end of the day, I can’t in good conscience be on a show that does not support Biblical values.
We discussed several other key points but these were some of the major reasons behind our decision to turn down the opportunity.
I am so grateful to God for a supportive husband. He carries that burden of financially providing for our family. I know $10,000 could really help, but I’m so glad he has strong faith. He not for a second was willing to compromise my witness as his wife and owner of this site, just for money.
I am also grateful for you all. You don’t know how much of an encouragement you are to me. You challenge me and make me strive to be better for God. He has given me this platform and I never want to make Him ashamed by steering you anywhere but to Him. Thanks you for all of your feedback and prayers on the subject.
If you want to join the discussion about the “Wife Swap” opportunity, join me on my Facebook page.
Thank you so much for sharing with us! I appreciate you taking the time to actually show how a Christian woman makes a decision…..consulting with her husband, considering the opportunity from a Christian and Biblical standpoint, thinking about the consequences of your witness, and praying about it.
Thank you for all you do to help Christian families! I am very pleased with what you decided…
Continued blessings be on you and yours!
Wow, Sherry. I didn’t intend for it to be a lesson in decision making. I’m so glad you pointed it out that way. Now you’ve given me an idea for a future post. Thank you for taking the time to leave your comment. You’ve blessed me with your feedback. I’m sure someone else would like to read a full article on how my husband and I make decisions. Thank you. 🙂
I applaud your decision and agree with your reasoning. In the end, it may have done more harm than good, not just for your family, but for the cause of Christ. How many viewers would come away with the idea that Christians are no different than non-Christians if they are willing to “bend” their principles for $10,000. God bless you and your family and the wonderful example you are to all of your readers!
Thanks so much for your support. I’m hoping it was a test from God to see if I’d seek HIS even in the BIG opportunities. I hope He knows that I will. It’s about more than just me. I know He has BIG things in store for me. Things that will allow me to help other believers without possibly being a stumbling block.
Thank you for being a woman of God. Everyting that glitters is not gold. It is inspiring that you and your husband came to the decision together not to appear on the show. You already have inspired so many people and I know will continue to inspire many more. Thanks for everything you do from ‘fab to frumpy’ to the ‘organizational binders’ videos you have made a difference in my life which trickles down to how I present myself before God and my family.
Aww…that’s special Clarissa. At the end of the day we can only be lead astray by our own lusts. I feel like I have everything I need. I am very open to appearing on a show that could be an encouragement to women, i just don’t think this was it. I’m keeping my eyes peeled though. LOL!!
I think you made an awesome decision with this and your first point was spot on. If God wanted you to have $10,000 he wouldn’t put your family at risk. I also don’t think you realize how large of a following you do already have. I have only been following your Facebook posts for 2 months now and I have shared your page with my sisters both spiritual and biological. There is soo much on here that has been a great help and in some cases blessing in my life. As a christian military wife having the input of other christian mothers in general is a blessing. Thank you soo much.
Thanks so much Eyvette. I’m humbled by what you said, “I also don’t think you realize how large of a following you do already have”. I appreciate it very much but I hope people are following Jesus and not me. I’m just a vessel. I fail daily (I’m human), but I want people to know that God never fails. Welcome to the community sweet friend.
You can certainly bask in the fact that they asked about you. I have been asked about being on two shows.. Knitty Gritty and The Martha Stewart Show. (yikes) My ‘partner in crime’ was chosen over me for the first one and while I send it a tape to the Martha people.. no word back.. But it’s really cool that they were interested in ME! little old me! So enjoy that part! You have definitely made the right decision! Keep being an encouragement to us here! I certainly appreciate it!
Good for you! I have often thought that it would be neat to be on a show like that. However, I don’t think I ever thought it through like you and your husband have. I am sure God is well pleased with your decision. Thank you for sharing this and your website.
I so agree with you. $10,000 would be tempting, but God has already blessed you so much and will continue to bless you as you live for Him. I don’t think I would do it either.
Yes…I’ve been blessed with more than I have asked for. If I added up the value of all God has done and is doing in my life, it would far surpass $10,000. I don’t want to jeopardize what He has called me to do where I am for the quick financial gain.
After reading your blog entry, I agree with your decision not to go on the show . $10,000 would seem tempting, but all of the things you mentioned [not having your kids exposed to the extreme opposite of your beliefs, and not having to worry about someone disrespecting your husband or his role in the family] are worth a lot more than that 10k. I think it’s great that you are staying true to your beliefs.
Thanks Tammy. My family is sooooo important to me. I’m glad they didn’t want to do the show either. My daughter (10 y.o) thought it was a weird show and didn’t want us to be on it but she changed her mind when I told her about the money. That turned into a lesson about compromising morals. My youngest son (8 y.o) thought that another women being here with his daddy and his mommy being at house with another man would not be a good thing. He’s never watched the show. I explained that it was separate rooms to see if that would change his perception, but he stuck with his decision. He was not interested in his parents doing a swap. My oldest son (12 y.o) wanted no part of it.
Thank you so much for sharing with us! I appreciate you taking the time to actually show how a Christian woman makes a decision…..consulting with her husband, considering the opportunity from a Christian and Biblical standpoint, thinking about the consequences of your witness, and praying about it.
Thank you for all you do to help Christian families! I am very pleased with what you decided…
Continued blessings be on you and yours!
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Sherry Hefner,
Wow, Sherry. I didn’t intend for it to be a lesson in decision making. I’m so glad you pointed it out that way. Now you’ve given me an idea for a future post. Thank you for taking the time to leave your comment. You’ve blessed me with your feedback. I’m sure someone else would like to read a full article on how my husband and I make decisions. Thank you. 🙂
[Reply]
I applaud your decision and agree with your reasoning. In the end, it may have done more harm than good, not just for your family, but for the cause of Christ. How many viewers would come away with the idea that Christians are no different than non-Christians if they are willing to “bend” their principles for $10,000. God bless you and your family and the wonderful example you are to all of your readers!
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Linda Merillat Komondy,
Thanks so much for your support. I’m hoping it was a test from God to see if I’d seek HIS even in the BIG opportunities. I hope He knows that I will. It’s about more than just me. I know He has BIG things in store for me. Things that will allow me to help other believers without possibly being a stumbling block.
[Reply]
Thank you for being a woman of God. Everyting that glitters is not gold. It is inspiring that you and your husband came to the decision together not to appear on the show. You already have inspired so many people and I know will continue to inspire many more. Thanks for everything you do from ‘fab to frumpy’ to the ‘organizational binders’ videos you have made a difference in my life which trickles down to how I present myself before God and my family.
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Clarissa P.,
Aww…that’s special Clarissa. At the end of the day we can only be lead astray by our own lusts. I feel like I have everything I need. I am very open to appearing on a show that could be an encouragement to women, i just don’t think this was it. I’m keeping my eyes peeled though. LOL!!
[Reply]
Awesome decision! I was glad to read all the reasons & whole heartidly agree!
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Courtney Willson,
Thanks Courtney. 🙂
[Reply]
I think you made an awesome decision with this and your first point was spot on. If God wanted you to have $10,000 he wouldn’t put your family at risk. I also don’t think you realize how large of a following you do already have. I have only been following your Facebook posts for 2 months now and I have shared your page with my sisters both spiritual and biological. There is soo much on here that has been a great help and in some cases blessing in my life. As a christian military wife having the input of other christian mothers in general is a blessing. Thank you soo much.
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Eyvette Golish,
Thanks so much Eyvette. I’m humbled by what you said, “I also don’t think you realize how large of a following you do already have”. I appreciate it very much but I hope people are following Jesus and not me. I’m just a vessel. I fail daily (I’m human), but I want people to know that God never fails. Welcome to the community sweet friend.
[Reply]
You can certainly bask in the fact that they asked about you. I have been asked about being on two shows.. Knitty Gritty and The Martha Stewart Show. (yikes) My ‘partner in crime’ was chosen over me for the first one and while I send it a tape to the Martha people.. no word back.. But it’s really cool that they were interested in ME! little old me! So enjoy that part! You have definitely made the right decision! Keep being an encouragement to us here! I certainly appreciate it!
[Reply]
Good for you! I have often thought that it would be neat to be on a show like that. However, I don’t think I ever thought it through like you and your husband have. I am sure God is well pleased with your decision. Thank you for sharing this and your website.
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Kristy Knouse,
Thanks!! 🙂
[Reply]
I so agree with you. $10,000 would be tempting, but God has already blessed you so much and will continue to bless you as you live for Him. I don’t think I would do it either.
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Dottie,
Yes…I’ve been blessed with more than I have asked for. If I added up the value of all God has done and is doing in my life, it would far surpass $10,000. I don’t want to jeopardize what He has called me to do where I am for the quick financial gain.
[Reply]
After reading your blog entry, I agree with your decision not to go on the show . $10,000 would seem tempting, but all of the things you mentioned [not having your kids exposed to the extreme opposite of your beliefs, and not having to worry about someone disrespecting your husband or his role in the family] are worth a lot more than that 10k. I think it’s great that you are staying true to your beliefs.
[Reply]
The Proverbs Wife Reply:
September 4th, 2012 at
@Tammy Smith,
Thanks Tammy. My family is sooooo important to me. I’m glad they didn’t want to do the show either. My daughter (10 y.o) thought it was a weird show and didn’t want us to be on it but she changed her mind when I told her about the money. That turned into a lesson about compromising morals. My youngest son (8 y.o) thought that another women being here with his daddy and his mommy being at house with another man would not be a good thing. He’s never watched the show. I explained that it was separate rooms to see if that would change his perception, but he stuck with his decision. He was not interested in his parents doing a swap. My oldest son (12 y.o) wanted no part of it.
[Reply]